It really hasn’t been too long, at least not for me. I kept returning back to my website to see how long it’d been since I updated and as badly as I wanted to update this abandoned place, I just didn’t have anything to say. I kind of still don’t. Life has been moving at a steady pace and I’m finding myself discovering more about myself as time passes. I don’t have as much patience as I use to. That’s a good thing, though. It just means I’m less apt to put up or deal with certain things. Honestly, I was never really a person to deal with anything when it came to the outside world and the people in it. Mostly, I’d just deal with family and those very close to me, which was also very limited itself. I’m still an insomniac, that hasn’t changed and I suppose it never will. I tend to do a lot of thinking at night, which is completely out of my control. But I’m sure there are some people who can relate to this.
Work has been more tolerable than usual. There would be times I’d sit there counting the minutes until I’m out of there but it virtually flies by now. Maybe it’s because I’m less stressed and on edge like I use to be. I can’t really pinpoint it, but it’s a relief anyway because I was losing my mind in there most of the time.
I think mostly I’m filled with regrets. If only I’d known the kind of things the future would bring, I would have been more selfish when it came to myself. But you live and you learn, I guess. Some lesson, though. I never would have imagined how being less selfish would have made me completely unhappy. That’s a sacrifice the universe fails to reveal until you’re damned near utterly broken. But all in all, when you’ve come to this realization, you start to find peace, even in the little things… things that people take for granted everyday.